During the 12 years our founder, Mike, worked for the Cambridge-based youth charity, Romsey Mill (www.romseymill.org), he would regularly find himself thinking “if only there was a loving home environment available to this young person”.  Sarah’s story below had more than one of these moments and was one of the many examples that resulted in Concrete Rose’s supported lodging scheme being established.

Stage 1:  Sarah* was referred to Romsey Mill for extra support in 2015 when she was 19.  She had just had a miscarriage, was living at a large hostel and experiencing very low mood, and suicidal ideation.  Relationships with her family had broken down, she had no other support networks and didn’t enjoy the hostel environment.  IF ONLY…

Stage 2:    She was evicted from her accommodation shortly after the referral due to rental arrears and because her poor mental health, stress and frustration had resulted in some challenging behaviour towards staff.  At this point Sarah felt she could not cope with things and attempted suicide which resulted in hospitalisation.  Sarah was moved out of the Cambridge area into another temporary hostel.  She felt especially vulnerable in this new area and increasingly isolated which exacerbated her low mood and mental health struggles.  IF ONLY…

Stage 3: Sarah moved to temporary housing back in the Cambridge area.  Although the accommodation wasn’t the most comfortable Cambridge was a place she liked and where she felt safe which improved her outlook.  At this point Sarah started to meet regularly with a Romsey Mill youth worker who not only gave her the space to talk and reflect but also focussed on her strengths and abilities.  Initially this included the opportunity for Sarah to express herself artistically, particularly by drawing and painting.  This gave Sarah confidence and purpose and she started to engage in other activities with Romsey Mill including retaking her English qualifications. Nevertheless, she would have to move.  IF ONLY…

Stage 4:  Sarah was moved to more semi-permanent self-contained accommodation in Cambridge with an en-suite bathroom and shared cooking facilities.  She felt much more settled and started to undertake voluntary work in the Romsey Mill children’s centre alongside an online qualification in childcare.  Sarah had also started a new romantic relationship.  However, though the relationship started well it quickly became apparent that the relationship was not a positive one.  Her boyfriend became more and more controlling – dictating where she could go, what she could wear and who she could see.  He moved into her accommodation without consent and there were also suspicions of physical violence.  When Sarah came away with Romsey Mill in the summer of 2016 she disclosed to a youth worker more about the level of abuse that was taking place and that she did not feel safe returning to her home.  IF ONLY…

Stage 5:  Romsey Mill managed to find some emergency accommodation for Sarah with a local vicar and his family.  At the same time, she was referred to the Multi-Agency Risk Assessment Conference (MARAC) to put some emergency measures in place to protect her.  IF ONLY…

Stage 6:  Sarah was moved to a refuge and then to more temporary accommodation.  Sarah continued to be supported by Romsey Mill and started to piece things back together.  She continued with her English qualification and again started to volunteer.  Yet, Sarah’s confidence remained fragile and her mental health was up and down.  Often, and by her own admission, she would look for love and approval through relationships.  In 2017 Sarah became pregnant.  Due to concerns about her ongoing mental health issues, her ability to effectively care for herself and a newborn child and possible coercion, control and domestic violence from the birth father social care were involved right from the start.  Sarah was also supported by the Romsey Mill young parent team, a family nurse and the mental health team all of whom had concern for her welfare.  IF ONLY…

Stage 7:  While still pregnant Sarah decided to move in with the birth father into a caravan in Cambridge.  This decision alongside patchy engagement with support services, some low-level drug use and deteriorating mental health raised serious alarms for those who were supporting Sarah.  Sarah was confronted with the reality of making significant changes in her choices and living arrangements or face the prospect of her daughter being taken into care.  IF ONLY…

Stage 8:  Sarah gave birth to her daughter and looked to cut all ties with the birth father.  She was discharged to her own dad’s house in Peterborough.  This had always been a difficult relationship and when her dad’s partner became pregnant Sarah, and her daughter, were told they were no longer welcome to stick around.  IF ONLY…

Stage 9:  Sarah relocated to a council property in Peterborough.  She continued to receive support from the social care team but other support ceased as she moved ‘out of area’.  Sarah tried to focus on raising her child but her mental health remained a challenge and she continued to sometimes feel isolated and struggled with the responsibilities of being a young mum especially without support from her own family.  IF ONLY…

Stage 10:  Slowly Sarah again felt more positive and confident and enjoyed being a mother.  She also found support through a local baby group.  As things continued to improve social care involvement stopped.  When her daughter was old enough to enter nursery Sarah started to work part-time which gave her focus and purpose.  Sarah continues to live in Peterborough, is working part-time and loves being a mum.  She intends to increase her hours when her daughter starts school in September.  However, she recognises that the journey to get to where she is now has been a tough one:

“Times were hard, I moved too many times to say and felt like I didn’t have a home.   However, I kept smiling because I knew there is always hope”

We are working hard to put an end to the “IF ONLYS” by establishing safe, loving and nurturing home placements through a network of hosts.  If you’re interested in becoming a host and making a difference to the lives of young people like Sarah join us this Thursday (9th December) for our live Zoom event:  https://tinyurl.com/ycxaza8v

Alternatively, please use the get in touch page to find out more.

*The name has been changed for the purpose of this case study